2020: Soundtrack Edition
I don’t know about you, but 2020 has been a year for the books. While the year hasn’t proven to be ALL bad, there were a lot of difficult moments, tears, and laughs thrown into the mix. Music is one of the keys to my heart; I love finding songs to accurately fit what I am going through during a particular time, or to make a situation even more memorable. Keep reading to see the soundtrack of MY year!
January: Excited x Jonathan McReynolds - It’s nothing like the excitement of a new year. I was determined that this was going to be an amazing year! I had my vision board ready, and had a million conversations about my plans for the next 12 months and how I planned to accomplish them. I felt that I was on top of the world and it would be one of the best years of my life!
February: Somebody Son x Jade Novah- As we all know, February is the month of love! Like many of us, I had my moments of feeling alone and just wanted to converse with someone of the opposite sex, somebody’s son to be more exact. I began removing the ideology that I’ve stuck with for so long about only dating for purpose and allowed myself to enjoy the moment of conversing with and meeting new people. One may or may have stuck around for the ride (Keep reading :) lol).
March: No Reason to Fear x J.J. Hairston & Youthful Praise - As we all know, March is when all he** broke loose and corona showed its’ little nasty, ugly head. Like most people, I didn’t think covid would pose much of a threat to us. Towards the end of the month I began to realize the impact that it had on many around the world when life as we knew it came to a complete halt. While I saw what was happening, I didn’t think we would be where we are today.
April: Crazy x Gnarls Barkley - Having to be on lockdown while living alone had to be one of the most difficult experiences of my life. Not being able to see my friends, have my usual Friday Target runs, or see my family was rough. I was holding it all together, or so I thought, until the blessed Easter day. I remember watching my church virtually and seeing our praise team hold a mini worship session after service and realized how much I desperately missed human interaction. I cooked Easter dinner for my friends to come by and pick up and when those plans fell through I lost it. I cried like a baby. That was the day when I knew that this pandemic was nothing to play with, especially mentally.
May: Black Girl Magic x Chrisette Michele - Although technically I completed school in March and the ceremony, although cancelled, was to take place in June, it finally hit me that I was officially a 2020 graduate. Say hello to the black queen with 3 degrees!
June: Brotha x Angie Stone - My heart was heavy with so many of our black women and men being killed senselessly. With so many of stories of these killings, the protests, and injustice, our culture really took a major hit over the summer. It was hard to watch and process everything that was happening. I found myself constantly praying for my black brothers and sisters, those known and unknown.
July: Never Lost x All Nations Worship Assembly Atlanta - One of the hardest months of my life to date. I found out my entire immediate family had covid. It hit my grandfather the hardest and what we thought would be a quick trip to the ER turned into a 3 month stay at a total of 3 hospitals. There were days where we honestly didn’t know if he would make it back home. I cried my hardest tears and prayed my most earnest prayers during this time. I wouldn’t wish that experience on even my worst enemy.
August: Wrong Places x H.E.R - A dating casualty turned wrong. Chile, another time and another blog post!
September: B.S. (Remix) x Jhene Aiko feat. Kehlani - After having a little moment, I had a period of self-reflection and remembered who the heck I was!
October: Damage x H.E.R. - I had to come to the conclusion that I deserved and wanted more then what I was previously being offered romantically. Standards were revisited, conversations were had, and journal pages written. I had to remind myself that people would only do what I allowed and it’s okay to not accept what is being offered if it doesn’t match my needs and wants.
November: I Want You Around x Snoh Aalegra - Remember the guy I casually brought up in February? Well he slowly made his way back around the block lol. After trying to dodge the bullet for MONTHS, he slowly wore me down. Though nothing serious has come out of it, I’ve learned to enjoy the present, be honest with myself and others, and enjoy the journey.
December: Womanifesto x Jill Scott - This month I have done a lot of self-reflection. I am rediscovering my likes and dislikes. I am figuring out what the grown woman Shauntia needs instead of making moves based off of the thoughts and decisions the teenage/young adult version of myself created for her. I am shaping my adult mindset and putting steps in place to hold myself accountable for staying true to my authentic self.
Bonus: I’m Alive x Rich Tolbert, Jr. - There a lot of people that didn’t make it to see the end of the year. I can honestly say that God has been the ONLY reason that I am still here today!
What is one song that you would put on your 2020 soundtrack? Let me know in the comments below!